#randompost Why I Love Being a Mom to Pre-Teens and Teenagers

Sunset from our camping site- summer of 2018

Many times, I think that teenagers get a bad rap. When I talk to my girlfriends about their teens and pre-teen kiddos, they are fast to lament the eye rolling, attitude giving, more expensive having offspring as compared to their same children in pre-school or early elementary. They say things like, "She always wanted to hang out with mommy and was so sweeeet. Oh, you'd think she was a different child now." And we laugh, of course, because it's meant to be funny-- and I won't say I'm not guilty of making such comments in jest every so often but it got me seriously thinking-- Why do we think this way??

Okay, time for the back story:

Earlier this year, I was really stoked on having another baby. I was. Mind you, my husband and I have 5 great kids between the two of us (think Brady Bunch), but I got it in my head that I wanted another one. When that wasn't happening for us, I had to come to terms with that and it made me much more inquisitive about the WHY??? Meaning WHY did I want another child in the first place? 

I have plenty of children to nurture, and I am a great mom, a great stepmom, and I enjoy my kids a lot. Even with all the other help I get in raising them: their dad, my mom, the older kids lovely mother of course... they are a lot of friggin work! So, again, why another one?

Well, I caught myself with the rhetoric about teenagers and pre-teens jammed up in my mind. They don't want to spend as much time with me anymore. They've lost some of that sweet little kid innocence. They have opinions and attitudes more like mine than like other children. But when I really thought about it, these are also the reasons I LOVE being a mom to older kids. I'll spell it out for you in a list:

1. Independent- If you are a parent or have helped raise some kids, do you remember when they were babies? How much time they required, and the amount of energy they require? Oh my God. A newborn all the way up to toddler age child requires your undivided attention and is totally dependent on you for food, nourishment, and to teach them everything. They are super cute and precious of course but I really like the fact that my older kids don't wake up at 5am in the morning to eat AND they are able to feed themselves. Booyah!
2. Quality time- Quality time with babies and small children is very tame, and can get boring --I believe they call this 'baby brain'... Well, with pre-teens and teenagers, you get to hang out with them and do fun stuff like go to amusement parks, concerts, shopping, and you're interests start to match up sometimes too. Its such a special thing for me to go get my nails done with my daughters or go play basketball with my sons. A bit more stimulating than watching Bubble Guppies or playing in the sandbox.
3. Teenage Angst- Ok, ok... your thinking, this is not a good one. Well let me tell you why it actually is top 3. Being able to help your teens and pre-teens with stuff that I've gone through (boys, tough teachers, college questions) that seems like the end of the world to them but I can actually help or make them feel better about it is very gratifying. 
4. Learning Moments- My kids teach me so much about what's happening in the world right now-- pop culture, music, fashion. Their understanding is at a point where we can have real deep conversations about things and it constantly amazes me how each of them thinks and sees the world- they inspire me.They teach me about myself and how I want to grow as a person to be a better mama/stepmama and person in general. 

Those are the main reasons why I love being a mom to pre-teens and teenagers and also why I'm cool with not having any more babies because the way I see it, our crew is the complete package already. Choosing to embrace what's already there y'all<3